When Grammatical Terms Walk into a Bar

Tom Sienkewicz
6 min readApr 27, 2021

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A few weeks ago I was inspired by a Facebook post I’d seen to post the following:

The Past, the Present and the Future walked into a bar. It was Tense!

Suddenly I was hooked and the grammatical terms walking into a bar just started flowing out on my Facebook page. I thought it would be fun to collect them all here in a blog. Enjoy!

Two Verbs walked into a bar. There was a lot of action.

A Plural Subject and a Singular Verb walked into a bar. There was a lack of agreement.

A Participle walked into a bar alone. It was dangling.

To, Clearly and See walked into a bar. They were a split Infinitive.

An Imperative Verb walked into a bar and started giving orders.

Two Imperative Verbs walked into a bar. They were in command.

An Imperative and an Indicative walked into a bar. They were in different Moods.

An Indicative Verb walked into a bar and started stating facts.

An Interrogative Verb walked into a bar but was unable to make an order. It wasn’t in the right Mood.

Two Passive Verbs walked into a bar. They had Subjects without any Objects.

The Verb Do and the Verb make actively walked into a bar.

The Verb Done and the Verb Made were walked into a bar by their Helping Verbs.

Done and Made walked into a bar. They didn’t do or make anything. They were Passive.

Is walked into a bar singularly but Are walked in as a Plural.

The Auxiliary Verbs walked into a bar to help with the action.

A Plural Subject and a Singular Verb walked into a bar but couldn’t reach an Agreement.

Verbs work especially well walking into a bar, but now, let’s move away from verbs to other parts of speech:

Oh ad Hey walked into a bar. There were great Exclamations.

Ten Proper Nouns walked into a bar. There was a lot of Name-calling.

A Person a Place and a Thing walked into a bar. They were all Nouns.

Three Adjectives walked into a bar and modified the place.

A Preposition walked into a bar followed by its Object.

A Prepositional Phrase walked into a bar with all due care.

Two Conjunctions walked into a bar and made a couple of connections.

I, You and They walked into a bar. They realized they were different persons.

I walked into the bar first. You walked into the bar second. She walked into the bar third.

A Noun walked into a bar and left quickly. A Pronoun took his place.

The Adverbs Happily and Quickly walked into a bar.

An Indefinite Article walked into a bar and couldn’t decide what to order.

The Definite Article walked into a bar and knew exactly what to order.

A Positive and a Superlative Adjective walked into a bar. They were not Comparative.

Good, Better and Best walked into a bar. Better and Best could not decide what to order. Good was Positive.

An Interjection walked into a bar. Wow!

More grammatical terms:

A First Person Singular and a First Person Plural walked into a bar. I proposed a beer. We agreed.

A First Person Singular and a First Person Plural walked into a bar. You didn’t.

Singular and Plural walked into a bar. Singular had just one beer while Plural had several.

Three Genders walked into a bar. It was too hot for Masculine, too cold for Feminine. Neuter said it was Neither.

A Subject walked into a bar looking for its Verb.

An Indirect Object walked into a bar. The bartender gave it a drink.

A Direct Object walked into a bar. The bartender sent it away.

And here are some about different kinds of phrases and sentences:

A Compound Sentence walked into a bar and the bartender asked them what they wanted to drink.

An Interrogative walked into a bar and started asking questions.

A Declarative Sentence walked into a bar and made a statement.

A Subordinate Clause walked into a bar and announced that it was just a hanger-on.

The Purpose Clause walked into a bar to order a beer.

The Result Clause walked into a bar and ordered so many beers that it got drunk.

The Wish Clause walked into a bar and got drunk. Would that it had resisted temptation.

The Contrary-to-Fact Clause walked into a bar. If it had not, it would not have gotten drunk.

An Incomplete Sentence walked into a bar to look for its missing Subject.

Now on to punctuation marks:

A Period and a Comma walked into a bar and got into a heated argument which the Period ended.

Three Periods walked into a bar together. The bartender asked them what they’d have. They replied . . .

A Quotation Mark walked into a bar and said “I’m looking for my missing buddy.

An End Quote walked into a bar and said Have you seen my buddy?”

An Exclamation Point walked into a bar and ordered a round for everyone!

An Apostrophe walked into a bar to take possession of the place.

An Apostrophe walked into a bar. The letter S followed because it was Singular.

An Apostrophe and the Letter S walked into a bar. The S entered first because they made a Plural.

And Apostrophe inspired me to move on to Figures of Speech:

An Apostrophe walked into a bar. The bartender asked what it’d have. It replied “O foamy beer, I order you!”

An Idiom walked into a bar like a bird on a wing.

An Idiom walked into a bar and drank a beer with a grain of salt.

An Hysteron Proteron walked into a bar and said “I paid my tab, I drank my beer, I placed my order.”

Alliteration walked into a bar and bought a biscuity, bread-like beer bound to be blissful.

Metonymy walked into a bar and ordered a pint.

Oxymoron walked into a bar. There was a deafening silence.

Hyberbole walked into a bar and said it was so thirsty it could drink a river dry.

Synecdoche walked into a bar, placed an order and asked if it could pay with plastic.

A Euphemism walked into a bar and had one too many.

Anastrophe and Yoda walked into a bar and said “Two beers we’d like.”

Anaphora walked into a bar, had a drink and said “I came, I ordered, I drank.”

Antanaclasis walked into a bar, got drunk and said “My time isn’t wasted when I’m getting wasted.”

Litotes walked into a bar. After tasting a local craft beer recommended by the bartender, Litotes said “Not bad.”

Onomatopoeia walked into a bar and ordered a beer. Then it slurped, gulped and burped.

And, finally, here are some based upon foreign languages:

A Singular Verb and a Plural Verb walked into a Greek bar and the bartender asked them where their Dual was.

An Active Verb and a Passive Verb walked into a Greek bar and the bartender asked them where their Middle was.

A Greek Neuter Plural Subject and a Singular Verb walked into a bar in actual Agreement.

An Acute Accent walked into a French bar, felt a sharp thirst, and ordered an aperitif.

A Grave Accent walked into a French bar and, voilà, made a serious friend.

A Circumflex Accent walked into a French bar and told the young (jeune) bartender to go on a diet (jeûne).

A Tilde walked into a Puerto Rican bar and ordered a piña colada.

An Umlaut walked into a German bar, ordered a beer and declared it süffig.

A Diaeresis Mark walked into a French bar and naïvely began separating Vowels.

A Diaeresis Mark walked into a German bar, saw the Umlaut and said it was its Doppelgänger.

The letter È walked into an Italian bar (not a café) and ordered a caffè.

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Tom Sienkewicz
Tom Sienkewicz

Written by Tom Sienkewicz

I taught Classics for 40+ years and am now Capron Professor Emeritus of Classics at Monmouth College in Illinois. Read more about me at www.tomsienkewicz.com.

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