Loafer Puns

Tom Sienkewicz
6 min readAug 28, 2021

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On June 3, I came across this punny meme on Facebook:

I reposted it and was inspired the next day to post this pun:
Employment opportunity for loafers at bread factory.

That post led to a long stream of daily posts of bread-related puns. These puns are listed here, not chronologically (i.e., not in the order in which they appeared) but thematically. I will spare you, however, the many punny comments I received from Facebook friends in response to these posts.

“Loaf” puns, of course, were the focus from the very beginning:
The manager of the bread factory told the workers to stop loafing around.
Baking is a labor of loaf at the bread factory.
I later repeated as “Working at the bread factory is a labor of loaf.” I didn’t intend the repeat. I’d forgotten that I’d used that one already, but it was probably worth repeating, and I doubt anyone notice.

The word “bread” is an obvious source for puns:
The loafers at a bread factory are exceedingly well bread.
Loafers at a bread factory were late for work because they got up on the wrong side of the bread.
The loafers at a bread factory worked well past their breadtime.
The loafers at a bread factory were bready for quitting time.
The loafers at a bread factory are thinking of opening a bread and breakfast.
The loafers at the bakery caught a thief bread-handed.

“Bread and butter” puns:
Following a difficult day at the bread factory the loafers hoped that tomorrow would be butter.
Loafers at the bread factory are butter bread.

And you can’t really make bread puns without “dough”:
Loafers at a bread factory don’t make a lot of dough.
The boss decided to dough away with loafers at the bread factory.
The loafers at the bread factory showed their manager what they can dough.

And many breads need “yeast”:
Loafers show up for work at the bread factory when you yeast expect them.
The loafers at a bread factory hope business is on the rise.
“Grain” is also important in bread punning:
The loafers at a bread factory ordered ingrainients for the recipe.
What do loafers at a bread factory use to solve their problems? Their grain matter.
Unfortunately, the loafers at a bread factory had no brawn and no grains.
And this variation: The loafers at a bread factory were all brawn and no grains.
The radical loafers at a bread factory were fired for going against the grain.
Today the loafers at a bread factory are chasing grainbows.
Come grain or shine the loafers go to work at the bread factory.
The loafers at a bread factory had a grain-storming session about their new bread recipe.

The loafers at a bread factory were caught with ill-gotten grains.
Motto of loafers at a bread factory: “Nothing ventured, nothing grained.”
Here we go a-grain with another pun about loafers at a bread factory.
I’d like to pick your grains for another pun about loafers at a bread factory.
I am racking my grains for another pun about loafers at a bread factory.

“Cereal” is related to “grain”:
All troop alert: There is a cereal killer at the bread factory!

Punning with “rye”:
Workers at a bread factory need to have rye humor.
No matter how you slice them, bread puns are a bit rye.
The loafers at a bread factory were upset because their new recipes kept going rye.
The loafer at the bread factory found a baseball card wedged between two slices of bread. It was a Catcher in the Rye.
The loafers at the bakery sell special bread for poets. It’s called poet-rye.

Punning with “wheat”:
The number of loafers working at the bread factory fluctuwheats seasonally.
Loafers at a bread factory throw their wheat around.
The loafers at a bread factory are wheating for a new shipment of supplies.
A lazy loafer is dead wheat at the bread factory.
A freshly-baked loaf of bread is worth its wheat in gold.
This pun about loafers at a bread factory is short but swheat.
The loafers at a bread factory were caught telling little wheat lies.
The loafers at the bread factory can’t wheat to share their latest bun with their customers.

Puns on different forms of bread:
The loafers at a bread factory retired because their careers were toast.
One day the loafers at the bread factory acted as if they were the best thing since sliced bread. The next day they felt like toast.
The loafers at the bread factory want to know it is is okay for Whole Foods to sell their sliced bread.
The loafers at a bread factory are experts at hot cross puns.
The loafers at a bread factory are on a roll.
Zweiback in their lives the loafers at a bread factory enjoyed their job.

Punning with ethnic breads:
What did the Indian baker say to the customer who asked for a recipe? “It’s naan of your business!”
The loafers at an Indian bakery were asked if they had any bread. They said they had naan, and the customer left disappointed.
The Indian bakery workers said they wanted naan of that tasteless American white bread.
Sourdough is second to naan.
The loafers at the Indian bakery tried to make a sourdough. It was a naan starter.
The loafers at a bread factory were so frustrated with that recipe that they decided to baguette.
The loafers at a bread factory were glutens for a good baguette.
The loafer at the bread factory was ticketed for croissant the busy street on red.
If you need some bread, challah loafers at the bakery.
The loafer at a bread factory knows ciabatta work harder to keep her job.
The loafers’ bakefest scone to be lots of fun.
The loafers looking for dough at the bread factory left no scone unturned.
These puns about loafers at a bread factory scone’t go on much longer can they? (posted on July 8th. These puns continued well into August!)

Multilingual:
The French Canadian loafers at the bread factory believe that life is like a loaf of bread because it is filled with pain.
The loafers at the German bakery wished their customers Gluten Tag.

Miscellaneous:
Here is another crumby post about loafers at a bread factory.
The loafers at the bread factory kept putting too much flour in their dough. They were glutens for punishment.
Two elderly loafers at a bread factory decided to grow mold together.
The loafers at the bread factory wish you a slice day.

And here are some multi-puns:
Posting this pun about loafers at a bread factory is the yeast I can dough.
The loafers worked at the bread factory because they kneaded the dough.
The logo at the bread factory: “Bready or not, here I crumb.
You can crust loafers at a bread factory to be kneady.
The yeast favorite thing the loafer at the bakery liked about his job was that it was so kneady.

In mid[-August I was still going strong, but wondered whether my Facebook friends were getting a bit weary of my loafers, so, on August 22, I posted this one:
My loafers at the bread factory have posted half-baked puns daily since June 4. Dough you think they are now bready to retire?

That post drew a few likes and comments, but nothing definitive, so, the next day, I posted this one:
The loafers at the bread factory decided to wheat to retire when their leavening loses its pun.

Finally, on Aug. 24, I drew the bread puns to a close with this post:
Today the loafers at the bread factory finally retired because their punny buns had finally gotten stale.

I hope you have loafed this batch of half-baked buns about loafers.

I won’t wheat for applause. I will leave now.

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Tom Sienkewicz

I taught Classics for 40+ years and am now Capron Professor Emeritus of Classics at Monmouth College in Illinois. Read more about me at www.tomsienkewicz.com.